"Richie, this illness, this closeness to death...it's had a profound effect on me. I feel like a different person, I really do."
"Dad, you were never dying."
"But I'm gonna live!"

-the Royal Tenenbaums

"MICHAEL, stop it. Do NOT do that in my car! Swallow it!"
-A lady up the street, yelling very loudly.

Sometimes the funniest things are the ones you hear from a distance.

"Most of my friends wanted to be white when we were growing up."
"I just wanted to be Justin Timberlake!"
-Two kids in my ethnic studies group

"I'm kind of a mountain man."
-Steph's dad, Mick, in the middle of a conversation.